By Jessica Frent
Before the holidays I had surgery and was forced to take a break from our beloved “hot room”. For almost two months I wasn’t able to practice and with every passing day I worried that my postures, which I had worked so hard to “perfect” wouldn’t look the same. I worried that my back bends wouldn’t be as deep, my balance would be lost, and my strength to hold triangle would be less than it once was. My first practice back, I was so concerned with how others may perceive my imperfections I went to the 5:30am, practiced in the back of the room, and hoped no one would notice me. I realized quickly I was the only one critiquing my postures with such precision and that perfection is a direction, not a destination. You can always go deeper, hold longer, or achieve a more graceful strength. It has been almost six weeks since that 1st day back while my practice isn’t the same it’s in some ways stronger than it was before. The “perfection” I was so worried about losing wasn’t lost it just shifted.
For those of you perfections out there like me, remember what the wise words we have all heard before "bikram yoga is a practice, not a perfect" and if you want to receive the full benefits it’s important to allow yourself to be vulnerable, learn something new each day, and not let your own ego make you afraid to step into the room after a break.