Self-Compassion

By Linda Scholten

As humans, we are perfectly imperfect. Yet so many of us expect perfection of ourselves and others, even if we don’t call it that. After all, we’re far too evolved to expect something like perfection of ourselves or others. Too perfect to be perfect?

Striving for what is ideal or best at whatever is important to you (health, appearance, relationship, career, finances, fitness, spiritual practice) can be just another form of perfectionism. And when we (or others) fall short of our expectations or ideals, there can be disappointment, frustration, a feeling of letting ourselves down. So often we self-sabotage, rebel against these high expectations and ideals. Many times we give up. Or re-double our efforts and perhaps sabotage ourselves again.   If I say I’m going to eat healthy, why do I go for the chocolate cake?   I have a great yoga session or workout, I worked and sweated my ass off and then I have a hamburger and fries. I say I am going to get some important work done – something I really want to do, and I find myself watching TV, reading a book, looking at Facebook. These are my own confessions – what are your versions of this?

I did some research on New Year’s (NY) resolutions. 62% of Americans either make usual or infrequent NY resolutions. 8% are successful in achieving their NY resolution and 24% completely fail. I pretty much expected this, but here is where the stats get interesting: 49% achieve partial success. AND, people who make resolutions are 10 times more likely to attain their goals than people who don’t.

So I shoot for the stars and hit the moon. In doing so, have I succeeded or failed? It is a matter of perspective.

So what does all of this have to do with self-compassion? I’m getting there, I promise.

We humans are complex – we have many levels – physical, emotional, mental, spiritual is one way to look at this. The part of ourselves that makes a goal, a commitment, a resolution is often the mental part. The part of us that makes the commitment is not the part of us that breaks it. That would usually be the emotional part. Studies of the brain show these many facets are housed in different parts of the brain, but that is a whole other discussion – here, I am making it simplistic enough for me to be able to talk about it.

So I make my plans, goals, resolutions with the mental part of my self. The emotional part of my self has its own needs, wishes and desires, so too, with the physical part of course. The higher part of my self – I’ll call it my Self (with a capital S) the spirit or soul (use whatever word you choose), observes, accepts, has compassion, vision, love. This is where I can have patience and loving kindness for my self – this is where I have self-compassion. This is the still quiet voice. I can access this part of my Self when I turn my attention there and observe the part of me that is the observer.

Compassion for my self is no more and no less important than compassion for others. One cannot truly exist without the other. Buddhism teaches this. The Buddhist compassion meditation includes compassion for self.

Compassion for self is not to be confused with self-indulgence or self-esteem. Compassion deals with what is. No stories, excuses, promises needed or accepted. With self-compassion I have grace, acceptance, forgiveness of what is and what is not. It is all good. All is well. It is what it is.

Applying grace in goals, resolutions, commitments, promises is perhaps the way my self can grasp this. Accepting good enough instead of perfect. Having patience with, and accepting my self when I hit 70%, 80%, 90% instead of 100%.

Shoot for the moon and reach the stars. Or shoot for the stars and reach the moon. Strive – you’re 10 times more likely to get there, than if you don’t. Just remember the gifts from the Self: Love, compassion, acceptance.   From Desiderata: “Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. You have a right to be here”. Just as you are. Perfectly imperfect.

Why Your Brain Loves Yoga

By Gabriel Axel for U.S. NewsI began my journey as an aspiring neuroscientist determined to understand the basis of what makes us human. What was our most fundamental essence that allowed us to be, express, and function in all the wondrous ways that we do? I knew the answer had to lie in the brain, the most complex and mysterious organ in the body and the one that held the most promise for unearthing the origin of our unique species. I toured universities in the U.S. and Europe, studying and conducting research looking for answers. I devoured every piece of knowledge I studied, mesmerized by the wonders of the brain.

I was looking for consciousness itself. I realized after some time, however, that consciousness itself was not to be limited to being found in the brain. All human endeavors that have ever reached greatness -- from elite athleticism and creative genius to humble expressions of grace through service -- have touched a deep strand of humanness, lodged within the metaphorical heart. As amazing as the brain was, I knew that consciousness -- this essence for which I was searching -- had to be lived and directly experienced.

I wanted some activity I could incorporate regularly that would help me develop physically, mentally, and emotionally, and also touch this ineffable essence itself. My busy schedule of study and research at the time did not allow for simultaneously doing various workouts and activities to these ends, so I set the intention of finding a single activity that would address these needs together. This was the pivotal moment when I found yoga. Yoga struck a deep chord in me. There were marked increases, both immediate and long-term, in physical strength and flexibility, mental calm and overall peace both inside and outside the actual practice. I was hooked.

Neuroscience has repeatedly demonstrated the capacity of the brain to rewire itself through experience, known as neuroplasticity. In a practical sense this means that every moment of experience creates grooves in the landscape of the brain, which then affects the way we relate to the minds and bodies of ourselves and others, as well as to the environment around us. The good news is that a changeable brain is a hackable brain -- in other words, by understanding some of the rules of brain function, it is possible to learn how to use its capacities more effectively in order to deliberately bring about positive change.

I discovered along the path that this deliberate act is part and parcel of yoga. Yoga is a scientific technology that harnesses the innate capability of the body as a vehicle for transformation. It is a technology, a human art, purposefully crafted to serve as a tool for maximizing the health and potential of the human being. Yoga has been popularized by its physical aspects, which are an integral component of the larger science of yoga. The system as a whole, which includes techniques that address many aspects of the human being, works the brain and nervous system in a synchronized and harmonious manner. The techniques are manifold, but they are based on core principles. These can be unpacked in a digestible manner using exercises that improve fitness and well-being if appropriately applied.

Yoga starts as the process of harnessing the brain's capacities and naturally evolves into the art of living well. As negative habits, patterns, and influences within ourselves and from the outside are progressively dropped in favor of more sustainable ones, yoga can become a way of life -- it becomes not about what we do, but how we do things. The principles of yogic science and brain science mesh together to create a blueprint for transformation. There is tremendous power in combining a technology that has stood the test of thousands of years of human evolution with a rigorous science of the most complex and fascinating organ in the human body.

These fascinating discoveries have moved me to the degree that I have felt compelled to share them. In this post we have focused on why we can and ought to be interested in this subject. In upcoming posts, you can look forward to exploring together principles that dovetail the insights of brain and yogic sciences into sets of techniques tailored for growth and that can be applied to your daily life and fitness routine. Together, we will practice with the brain in mind.

Yoga for Panic Attacks

By Lisa Jakub

I’ve heard several people say that they don’t like Bikram yoga because it’s not meditative or spiritual. I suppose on the surface it looks like boot camp, but it is not purely physical; it is an incredibly deep meditative practice.

I get panic attacks. I have been carried out of restaurants, bars, house parties and art galleries because I am a hyperventilating, sobbing mess. For a time they were so debilitating it was difficult to leave my house.

I thought Bikram might help me manage stress but I was very nervous about trying it. It involved going to a place I had never been and staying in a room for 90 minutes with people I didn’t know. This is a terrifying prospect for someone with panics like mine. I literally had an entire therapy session dedicated to discussing if I could survive my first Bikram yoga class.

I did survive. In fact, I thrived.

It is all well and good to meditate in a candle lit room with soothing music and people using gentle voices. It does feel great and I enjoy those types yoga classes, too. But they didn’t help me with my reality. I need to learn to relax when my brain throws some serious, hardcore panic at me.

Bikram has trained me to breathe and meditate when I am trapped in a room that is really bright, a million degrees, packed with people who smell and a teacher who is loud. That’s why I can now survive life in my head.

When I panic, it is bright and loud and I’m dizzy and nauseous. I can’t run away from that situation, either, but that’s fine because this yoga has taught me that there are options beyond fight or flight.

I rarely get panic attacks anymore. I have the same stress and the same triggers. The panics rise up and threaten me; they insist that I can’t breathe and I am going to die immediately. Then, I hear my teacher:

Meet resistance with breath. – Lizzie.

Don’t meet panic with frustration or defeat or anger. Just take a moment. Then, I hear another teacher:

This is going to hurt like hell. It’s O.K. Don’t be scared.  - Kirk.

I know I can do it, I can make it through this just like I make it through class four times a week. Then, I hear another teacher:

Deep breath in. Let it out slow. – Amy

And that’s exactly what I do.

The hot room is my training ground for the real world. Those instructions – seemingly about my physical practice – are the deepest, most spiritually profound lessons I could imagine.

Maybe it looks like boot camp to you, but to me, it’s church.

Lisa Jakub retired from acting so she could be a writer, yogi, wife, traveler and dog-mom. Read more from her at 

JustHereJustNow.com

 and 

LisaJakub.net

80+ Year Old Teacher Emmy Cleaves Schools Us in Yoga

We love this interview by Yogin’ It of Master Teacher Emmy Cleaves, who discovered Bikram Yoga after suffering a brain hemorrhage at age 35. Now in her 80s, Emmy continues to teach at Headquarters in L.A., inspiring students of all ages to heal their bodies and improve their lives with Bikram Yoga.

In the video, Emmy calls yoga “the best health-maintenance system that I’ve ever discovered. … I wouldn’t stick with something for 60 years if I found something better. … It’s really a science of life, of humanity.”

Intro quoted from Bikram Yoga Vancouver Blog courtesy of Trevor Ellestad & Noa Glow.

3 Reasons Why Yoga Is Great For Your Heart: A Cardiologist Explains

By Dr. Joel Kahn

The practice of yoga is growing in popularity but it is still rare to see yoga classes incorporated into hospital programming or office based clinics. There are obvious mental and physical benefits to the combination of physical exercises, breathing and meditation.

Recent scientific studies have documented benefits of a yoga practice on important heart functions and a wider use of yoga in therapy of heart patients should follow.

1. Yoga reduces the frequency of atrial fibrillation (AF).  

Atrial fibrillation is the most common cardiac rhythm disturbance and leads to frequent office and hospital visits, costing millions (if not billions) of health care dollars.

 

It's an unpredictable disorder of the heart rhythm and can interfere with work, vacations and family gatherings when out of control.

Recently patients with intermittent AF were studied for three months as a baseline and then followed for three more months while practicing yoga twice a week for 60 minutes.

During the three months of yoga practice, episodes of AF dropped in frequency and patients rated their quality of life as better.  There were also decreases in blood pressure and resting heart rate. Patients up to age 80 were studied.

2. Yoga is good for people with high blood pressure. 

High blood pressure or hypertension (HTN) effects millions of people worldwide and can result in heart disease, stroke, and kidney failure. The usual therapy is medication and dietary.  Recently 50 patients with HTN participated in a yoga practice for 15 days lasting 2 hours each session. Cardiac function was assessed before and after this training.

After practicing yoga for two weeks the resting heart rate, systolic and diastolic blood pressures were significantly reduced.  A comparison group that did not do the training did not experience these beneficial trends.

3. It reduces stress. 

The autonomic nervous system (ANS) controls silently controls the function of the heart rate and blood pressure. A heart that is healthy demonstrates a wide swing in heart rate and blood pressure during inspiration and expiration and a disease heart shows little of this variability, a measurement called heart rate variability (HRV). HRV is influenced by the two parts of the ANS: the parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous system.

Scientists compared HRV in long term practitioners of yoga compared to matched controls who did not practice yoga. The HRV was increased in the yoga practitioners and they showed less sympathetic tone (stress, adrenaline) and more parasympathetic tone (relaxation, vagal) of their ANS. Their cardiac response to day-to-day stress was improved with yoga.

Yoga should be considered by patients and practitioners as another "tool" in the tool box of controlling stress, HTN, and heart rhythm disorders. As many cardiac patients are elderly, modifications such as chair yoga and predominantly pranayama breathing exercises may be necessary, but are still beneficial.

Namaste.

Photo Credit: Shutterstock.com

About Dr. Joel KahnDr. Kahn is a Clinical Professor of Medicine at Wayne State University School of Medicine and Medical Director of Preventive Cardiology at the Detroit Medical Center. He is a graduate Summa Cum Laude of the University of Michigan School of Medicine. He lectures widely on the cardiac benefits of vegan nutrition and mind body practices.Connect with Dr. Joel Kahn: drjkahn.comMore from Dr. Joel Kahn on MindBodyGreen